To our pagan friends - Happy New Year!
Unless you are one of those weirdoes who celebrate it at Yule, but that makes no sense so go ahead and change your deeply held spiritual beliefs to better reflect my personal whim!
Trust me, you will feel better about your life choices once you do.
To our non-pagan friends - Happy Halloween!
To our friends who don't acknowledge Halloween or Samhain - Happy Survivor Day! (a new episode is on tonight)
To those who don't celebrate anything, for any reason - generic greeting to you. I hope your day is satisfactory.
***
They say that Samhain is the time of year where the veil between the living and the dead is the thinnest. It's a time to remember those on the other side of it.
If that is the case, that must be why it's been weighing so heavily today. Either that or the fact that I realized that 4 years ago today is when I found out we had lost our first contestant. Which means last night is when it actually happened.
Nathalie (agirlnamedluna) loved to post as close deadline as possible. She was particularly skilled at coming up with these amazing entries at the last possible moment, making everyone wonder if she was going to make it in time or not.
She literally died at her computer the night of a deadline. I wonder if the thought that "Idol has killed me" is a thought that went through her last moments. I doubt it. It was probably about her daughter - but Nath would have been the first one to laugh and say that she knew Idol would end up killing her.
It doesn't seem like 4 years. It seems like 10. I'm a different person. Idol is a different place. (Literally a different place at the moment!)
In some ways, I've fought to keep Idol going over these last 4 years, and trying to find ways to keep it going despite LJ being LJ, *because* we lost Nathalie, and she would want to keep playing.
Nath was the first. But she was followed by Cris, Talesia, Fran and Alex.
The grief, the loss, it piles up. It surprises you at the most unexpected moments.
But you go on. You move forward. Because it's important to celebrate them. It's important to remember them.
And, maybe if that "veil" really is at it's thinnest today, maybe, somehow, they know that we do.
I miss all of you. Thank you for being a part of this crazy little idea that I had. Thank you for being a part of my life.
***
As for the rest of you - *kicks you*
The topic deadline is tomorrow:
https://therealljidol.dreamwidth.org/1005921.html Get to work you slackers!
Also - We eliminated a couple more last right with the results of the Write-Off -
https://therealljidol.dreamwidth.org/1007275.html Make sure to head over there and say a little something to them.