Green Room - Week 13 - Day 7

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

I learned something important this weekend - apparently being gay is a "choice that people make".

Yes, that was part of the response to the email I sent. (see GR from a few days ago for details). The gist of it was that there had been a misunderstanding and that *of course* my sister and her wife were invited to come to the house whenever they wanted. It then though went on to say - as these things do - about being how being gay is a choice.

Being a straight man, I of course remember that day - so long ago - when I had to contemplate "Will I be gay?"

(In truth, had I been - my post-high school life would be *a lot* more active! There were a lot more guys hitting me on me than women! In retrospect, I may have made the wrong "decision"!)

The good thing though is being told that all the kids are still very much loved *regardless of what they decide*. Even though being gay is, of course, defying "how God wants you to be".

***

So, Happy Pi Day - Happy First Day of Daylight Savings Time - and Happy Last Day of the Poll for Week 13! http://therealljidol.livejournal.com/907438.html

and Happy "Deciding on if you are going to be gay or not" Day! Hope you all decide "the right way"! :D

***

What are *you* celebrating today?

Comments

[adoptedwriter.livejournal.com]

Guess your letter went over about as well as it could have. It's hard to convince other older people.

I'm celebrating finding my lost keys! Yay!

Pizza for my Pi Day dinner!


PS: 1st again!

AW

[kathrynrose.livejournal.com]

As an "older person," I gotta say that bothers me some. It's harder to convince people of any age who are dug in on a dogma that says otherwise.

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

Isn't there a cloud you need to yell at? ;)

(I've heard that's what old people do!)

[halfshellvenus.livejournal.com]

I think she and you and I are about the same "vintage" of older people.

Our parents, though... my mom is 90, and I believe she was thinking about people in their 70s and beyond. It's not just that they're older, it's that they're part of a generation with beliefs that are very different from the current.

Often, it's about trying to undo a cultural mindset, and that can be really hard to accomplish.

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

They are in their 60s. So a different generation of "old people" from what you are talking about. :)

[halfshellvenus.livejournal.com]

o_O You whippersnapper! What the heck is wrong with them, then! And you?

[adoptedwriter.livejournal.com]

This is true.


AW

[uselesstinrelic.livejournal.com]

My gran is 84 and she's facing the idea of having to start thinking about assisted living. She has been avoiding the topic and saying she's not ready. I thought I understood because the thought of losing your independence would be hard but we talked about it and she said no, actually that wasn't the problem. The problem is that so many people in her age group want to listen to the same music from the forties and have the same opinions in a changing world. She feels really alienated from peers that hate the idea of anything being different and doesn't yet feel ready to live in a community where she might not have things in common with people. I feel like young people can even be stuck in their own ways, but I've certainly met older adults and elders who shiver at change! Not all, of course!

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

One of my other brothers ended up calling them as well - and they mentioned to him that my email "confused them", because they've always been supportive.

His take was that there was a "misunderstanding". But considering that both siblings directly impacted by all of this came back with direct quotes... yeah, not a "misunderstanding".

The goal though isn't to change their minds. It's to alter their behavior so that they didn't shut either of them out. If they want to say "misunderstanding" instead of "we were just confronted by ALL of our children" (*everyone* reached out to them within 24-hours of each other, there are 5 of us) I'll let them have it.

[barrelofrain.livejournal.com]

Hey Gary, I was really under the weather this weekend, so I didn't get to say this til now, but I really think it's awesome that you're supporting your siblings. My life would be a lot different without the love and support of my siblings. I'm really proud of you that you're standing up to the rest of your fam even though it could have a negative effect on you. Not everyone would make that tough choice. xx

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

I don't really see myself as having much of a choice - once I knew what was said, I needed to take *some* action. It was just a matter of what I was going to say and do.

I wish I was in a position to do more.

I'm glad you have supportive siblings!!

[xo-kizzy-xo.livejournal.com]

I'm celebrating having two days off in a row! I have a feeling I'll also be celebrating Daylight Savings by napping off and on all day. It must be age because I don't ever remember it affecting me physically the way it's currently affecting me :shakes head:

How is being gay a choice, anyway? I've always likened it to one's eye color in "that's how you were born" :shrug:

I always had more gay male friends in school than I had heterosexual female friends. I always had the unfortunately habit of developing crushes on a few of them, though, which ultimately destroyed any friendship we'd had.

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

I've heard the "it's a choice" argument before. But it's been a really long time since I've heard it "in person".

[xo-kizzy-xo.livejournal.com]

I've never heard it in person. People -- especially the older generation -- in these parts tend to be, "We know it's there, we just don't openly acknowledge it".

[eternal-ot.livejournal.com]

Heh! Cheers to a positive outcome..:) I am celebrating feeling not guilty about not commenting on entries..:P..Though have read and voted this week and there have been pretty amazing reads.. Good job, guys!:)
Thankfully my comp has finally accepted that LJ is not malicious in whatsoever way it meant it was. :D (Some bug which got fixed, I am assuming)

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

I'm sure LJ will find a way to be malicious again in the near future!

[tijuanagringo.livejournal.com]

Yeah, and I guess I chose to be left handed, too. ;-0

[halfshellvenus.livejournal.com]

That's exactly what I equate it with!

A regularly-occuring variation on normal, which cannot be cured by forcing people to write with the other hand or making them think the left hand is "evil," and which is surely biological... but not necessarily based in a particular gene.

You "choose" to be left-handed the way you choose not to do things with the wrong hand your whole life. :(

[tonithegreat.livejournal.com]

I'm celebrating my kids having their spring break this week and attempting some "camping by night, going in to the office by day" action to celebrate with them. So far it's going okay.

I'm also celebrating actually managing (I think!) to comment on everything this week! It's been great stuff to read and comment on, too.

[halfshellvenus.livejournal.com]

I'm glad your dad and his wife have backed away from the "shunning" position. That seems an improvement.

I also hope that spending time with their kids and spouses will help them evolve their opinions a little, too. That might be "Pi-in-the-sky" thinking, but that's me!

I'm not celebrating anything today. I'm vegetating at the office and waiting to wake up, which should happen in about, oh... 5-10 days?

[sinnamongirl.livejournal.com]

Well, baby steps? I've seen a lot of random stuff online and on TV about older people who just took time to adjust, though it's always, obviously, a personal choice if one wants to give that adjustment time. I... will sound like a cold-hearted asshole here, but sometimes I just console myself with the idea that those who are hidebound and elderly will die off sooner or later, leaving a fresh young crop of understanding, open-hearted, nonjudgmental people.

Not that I wish for anybody to die, but for instance, when dealing with racism in my family, I'm just like "it's okay, he'll be dead in 10 years, we won't have to deal with this anymore."

Yeah, I'm an asshole.

Nothing to celebrate today, just waiting to hear back about the job I interviewed for. Could take up to a week to hear back, and I'm already freaking out about deciding to go for the lower pay, no stress option, versus the higher pay, higher stress option. gack.

[oxymoron67.livejournal.com]

Ah, yes, the "it's a choice" argument.

My brother threw that at me when Obergfell (I know I misspelled this) went up before the Supreme Court.

I think it's great that you stood up for your siblings. Hopefully, your parents will eventually come around.

As for me, work has been nuts today, and I haven't been sleeping well, so I feel like I'm in slow motion. It;s taking more time to accomplish things than it should, but I am getting work done.

[ryl.livejournal.com]

Why is it that being gay is a choice, but being straight never is?

[uselesstinrelic.livejournal.com]

This.


(Btw, I have also tried to "choose" to "be straight" and make it work like a Tim Gunn moment. And it doesn't work. It just.... doesn't work XD You are what you are! XD)

[lordrexfear.livejournal.com]

I suck at making choices...
I guess I'll just keep being whatever.

I'll celebrate "Whatever" day.

[uselesstinrelic.livejournal.com]

I'm celebrating getting a wheelchair!! I am not trying to make light of wheelchairs. I mean, I'm sure there will be times it drives me bonkers, but I've been having a lot of discomfort and trouble moving and so this is actually a great relief. Just to get from here to there without it being painful or getting exhausted is really something worth celebrating! Also I had a really great pot of coffee o....o YUM.