Green Room - Week 10 - Day 5

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

Why are you posting?

You have thoughts all the time. Some of them make it out there in the world, and others don't.

You decide which ones are worth leaving your fingers and going out there in the world. Sometimes it might be what you had for dinner. But other times, it's what you think about an issue that is important to you, or something that you find annoying.

Are you putting it out there to have an echo chamber of agreement? A conversation? Sympathy? Empathy? Hearing that you are not alone?

Because you have a reason. Even if it's "just because I wanted to", there is an expectation of what you want to receive in response. Otherwise, you wouldn't put it out on the internet.

Which is why I find reactions to responses so interesting.

(Any resemblance to anyone affiliated with Idol is both intentional *and* a coincidence. Because these topics came up in about 5 different places over the weekend, and I'm sure one of those had Idol people involved. So not talking about anyone specifically, BUT if you recognize yourself, you may have inspired this thought process, which contains a lot of half-formed thoughts and probably me saying several stupid things in the process! :D) )

The two discussions that spurred the thought process in *my* head were "The meaning of Memorial Day" and "Discussion that lead to 'Not All Men" (the latter being on several different original topics that all led to the same place)

Memorial Day summaries: "Memorial Day is about honoring those who gave their lives serving their country!"
"I love veterans!!!!"
"OK, but that's Veteran's Day."
"YOU CAN'T TELL ME NOT TO CELEBRATE VETERANS TODAY AS WELL!!!!"
(Note: I also saw this conversation flipped as well)

This one reminds me of the Mother's Day one where people point out that the holiday originated being about the role of women taking political and social action on behalf of making a better life for their kids - while the more modern definition seems to be focused on "You gave birth".

Everyone has points. But the discussions rarely go well. One side is making the "historically" point, while another comes from an emotional "this is how I WANT it to be!"

Which is a world away from the more intellectual discussions that tend to end up being about "Not All Men". For those who *don't* know what this is about, it's when a woman starts talking about her experiences with sexism (or pretty much everything) and makes a generalized statement about "men". Then a guy jumps in and says "Well NOT ALL MEN".

Here's the problem - of course he's right. Making generalizations about an entire group of people is inherently wrong as well as being logically faulty. (Anyone who makes extreme statements about entire groups of people should be executed!!!! :p)

Here's the bigger problem - of course he's wrong. Because it has absolutely *nothing to do* with the actual conversation that is taking place, and by jumping in with that, he's just sidetracking the whole conversation to being about him. Which is pretty f-ed up.

I'll completely admit to jumping in on conversations! But they tend to be on my friend's posts, when things seem a little tense, and I'll say something stupid or silly to lighten the place up. Most of the time when I do that on facebook, it's so that I can get notifications to see the rest of the conversation as it unfolds.

One thing that got me this weekend though, because it was interesting and made me think about the idea of posting and commenting on another level - was that most of these conversations that I came across had at least one person coming out and saying that men don't have a place in a discussion, and shouldn't be commenting at all, about such things in something that is intended to be a "safe feminist space".

That very phrase was used in each case. Which made me wonder: Is your blog/facebook/LJ posts a "safe feminist space"? (I'm using that as an example, but I've seen the same things said about open discussions about issues impacting PoC. Although I haven't seen an "Not All White People meme go viral. Maybe it has and I just wasn't paying attention!!)

Are you only posting to certain people? If so, why not restrict it? Filters exist. People let certain people into their circles, and stop other people from coming into them.

Which is more control that most people have in the rest of their lives.

It's weird, because I was agreeing with everything they were saying, right up until that. Then it became a question mark of "What is the intention of the post?" and the bigger "what is the intention of your personal space as a whole?"

Is it a safe place FOR YOU to talk about things with friendly faces that will agree? Is it a place to bounce around ideas with friends? (as long as no one is an asshat about it, which is always the part people seem to forget, disagreeing with someone is *usually* OK, as long as you don't act like an asshat!)

Why do YOU post and what do you expect from the people commenting?

***

NOTE: Because there seems to have been a lot of confusion, the deadline for this weeks topic is THURSDAY. Not today. Not yesterday. Not two weeks ago. This coming Thursday. http://therealljidol.livejournal.com/741490.html

The Work Room is still open for people who need extra help: http://therealljidol.livejournal.com/741679.html

Comments

[anyonesghost.livejournal.com]

That's the funny thing about being aware of your audience. As it grows and grows, the amount of work needed to filter grows and grows, to the point where one might forget what one was going to post in the first place.

... which, some days, isn't a bad thing. ;-)

And, ironically, it's why I don't post a lot; and when I do, it tends to be pretty innocuous stuff. Of course, then I write odd stories with no trigger warnings whatsoever, so I'm perhaps not one to claim to be digital Switzerland, either.

[adoptedwriter.livejournal.com]

Happy First! AW

[adoptedwriter.livejournal.com]

I post to stay in touch. I post to get input/advice./feedback. I post to socialize. I post because it's cheaper than shopping.
I took back my "I'm taking a bye " option and have posted an entry. This week because that insane writing worm got into my brain last night when. I had time to myself to write.
AW

[roina-arwen.livejournal.com]

I noticed you posted an entry! Sometimes writing is good for what ails you. I haven't read the entry yet - was just skimming down my Flist - but I'm glad you were able to tackle the prompt, and I hope hubby is doing well.

[roina-arwen.livejournal.com]

I think this is why I sometimes prefer LJ to Facebook. On the one hand, I can restrict LJ posts to "friends only" or to particular subsections of friends, like "LJ Idol folks" or "Inner Circle" or whatever. On Facebook, there are status update restrictions one can use as well, but honestly I just don't trust them as much. Maybe that doesn't make any sense, I don't know...

I don't post general updates quite as much on LJ as I used to, but then again I feel that for the most part I have a ho-hum life, so who really cares? I'm happily married, don't have any kids, and there's only so much cat-related stuff that people want to hear about. Sometimes I post because I want feedback or ideas, or just to let people know that I'm still alive and hanging around, or to remind myself of little things, like what books I read this year.

I don't do politics or OMGSocialOutrage sorts of things, because I'm mellow and laissez faire (or however that's spelled). But hey, if that appeals to you and you want to add me to your Flist, that's cool too. :)

[penpusher.livejournal.com]

Ultimately the design of the LJ layout is brilliance and really contributes to social media, as the filters allow you to post to specific audiences without needing to do much of anything as far as the actual writing goes.

Plus the threaded comments allow people that don't know each other to interact. Several people from my friendslist became very good friends with each other through comments they left on my journal, and that's one of my proudest moments in LJ Land!

Say what you will about brad, but he created a really incredible site. I'm still trying to get more people to use it again. No other site works nearly as well. The stigma, of course, is for those that grew up with LiveJournal, this is a part of their childhood, and probably not one they want to relive or even remember. And that's a lot of people!

Oh well. We'll always have ohnotheydidnt!

[joyfulfeather.livejournal.com]

If I make a post - or hell, if i say something offline/in person - I expect people to not be shitty to me. If a friend says something, I expect people to not be shitty to them. People need to be civil. And trolls need to just NOT. They serve no useful function in conversations.

Of course, I tend not to make posts that are going to inflame people. (And if I do, no one really pays much attention anyway, but that speaks more to my lack of people around me than anything else.) I just don't think on my feet well enough, especially about things I feel strongly about, to do more than wave my fists in impotent rage because I just don't get how people don't understand! How can I explain that women don't owe men our time or bodies to someone who doesn't already get it?

On another note, thank you for giving us more time this week! It meant I didn't have to immediately write and post my entry after a stressful 4.5 hour drive home in pouring rain.

[roina-arwen.livejournal.com]

I hate driving in the pouring rain - it's so much more stressful!

[medleymisty.livejournal.com]

I say whatever crosses my mind, generally in public but not always, and pretty much what I want in response is...well, like my most ever best friend online is in that position because she gets what I want in response.

I say a long thing about me, and what I want in return is a long thing about you. I share myself, and what I want in return is for you to share yourself with me, and that way we can both learn and have new insights and maybe learn how to empathize better with people who aren't us.

Of course sometimes I just want compliments on my writing, but even there I like it to be in-depth and a sharing of your response to my writing and your thoughts about it and how it affected you.

Sometimes I don't want an actual response at all, and I just want to make people think.

Sometimes I just want to express myself and know that someone somewhere read it and so I matter.

Sometimes I just want to hear "Me too", and to know that I'm not the only one dealing with whatever I posted about.

I didn't like filters, for years. I hate excluding people. I saw them as immoral. But it finally got through even my thick as hell idealism that there are some nasty mean uncaring people out there online, and so now I use friendlock a little more than I used to. Still not very often though, and generally just when I am talking about stuff that I specifically don't want the people who I know stalk my blog to see - usually because I am talking about them, lol.

Also, thank goodness, I am married to a dude who gets how toxic the "not ALL men!" thing is and he doesn't do it.

[bleodswean.livejournal.com]

Such a nice summation of a worthwhile LJ experience! I enjoyed reading your voice.

[lrig-rorrim.livejournal.com]

There's a very simple answer for me (which ignores a lot of complexity) to "why are you posting?" and that's this: "because I have something to say." I'm packing right now, and tying up all the little ends so I can be away from home for another week and a half, but I saw this and thought "oh! I... actually have something to contribute to that!" and so here I am. :)

I spent all weekend at WisCon, which is a feminist science fiction convention, talking and debating and thinking about just this kind of stuff. For what it's worth, there are a lot of feminist guys (not at all a contradiction in terms) who attend the con, help run the con, sit on panels, speak up at panels, and all that fun stuff. And yet it is most definitely meant to be a "safe space". Gatekeeping (not the terrifying Idol version, but instead the kind where people say "well you're not $Thing enough to participate here") is pernicious and pretty nasty, and I think it's a something to watch out for and fight when one can.

That said, I think a lot of people get frustrated at having to explain the same things over and over and over and over again - so understanding the context of the discussion one is joining is pretty important. If you're looking at some folks talking about their personal experiences and sharing stories, hopping in and saying "well, those things don't happen to everyone" (i.e. Not All Men and other variations) is pretty rude. There are a lot of 101-type questions that some folks get tired of explaining, and of having to explain when there are so many resources out there that are trivial to find. It becomes then about the burden of education, and being an ambassador, instead of actually having a conversation. Most of the time, those kind of places are really obvious - if you go to Feministing.com (http://feministing.com/), their comment policy is super clear, and the Feminism 101 (http://finallyfeminism101.wordpress.com/) blog is linked in their FAQ. They're not trying to create an echo-chamber (though that may be the effect) - they're just trying to have conversations in a public space without having to cover the same territory constantly. Nowhere in there does it say that men aren't welcome, though.

I do think there's value in having a semi-closed conversation in an public place - just reading the dialogue between those people might do the work of educating others. But full-on exclusion? I'm not ok with that. But, you know *shrug* if it's someone else's journal or facebook feed or whatever, and that's the standard they're setting? Well, ok then. I don't like to tell other people what to do with their online spaces.

This discussion reminds me a little bit of Hiromi Goto's guest of honor speech - here it is (http://www.hiromigoto.com/wiscon38-guest-of-honour-speech/). She talks mostly about stories and writing fiction, but it fits the theme. Who gets to speak up, about what topics? The main thing I took away from her speech was to be thoughtful, to be careful. And that's a good lesson to carry into any discourse, whether it's a long slow one like a story or a crazy fast one like a twitter feed. Or LJ comments. :)

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

"There are a lot of 101-type questions that some folks get tired of explaining, and of having to explain when there are so many resources out there that are trivial to find. It becomes then about the burden of education, and being an ambassador, instead of actually having a conversation."

What popped into my head was "I love mutants, like Wolverine and Spider-man".

"Spider-man isn't a mutant"
"Sure he is..."

101 stuff of explaining the same thing over and over. You start out pleasant, but by the 100th time, you just want to slap someone. :)

Every subgroup has them.

Only Connect

[bleodswean.livejournal.com]

Oh, Gary, you can write! Nice. (I haven't been privy to your thoughts-in-more-amounts-of-words before. WHERE do YOU post?)

This question comes up A LOT in my life and has over the lifetime of the internet. I suppose we could go all the way back to school when it was a classroom introduction as well as a coffee bar ponderation - WHY do you WRITE. But that's a slightly different question. I post because of the sense of friendship and community that is on LiveJournal. This is my only social media for sharing. I tried FB for several dark months a few years back and THAT experiment is something I should WRITE about but I think my experience is universal and I just was able to escape while so many others don't realize they can and/or should.

I don't consider my LJ a blog because I only post for the back-and-forth dialogue that (hopefully) takes place in the comments rather than the graffiti-like text that is so much blogging or an ed-op piece. Some years I'm talking with a HUGE group of folks some years it's a handful. And all of that is okay, the idea is EXCHANGE. Or....ONLY CONNECT.

Only connect! That was the whole of her sermon.
Only connect the prose and the passion, and both will be exalted,
And human love will be seen at its height.
Live in fragments no longer.
Only connect... ~ E.M. Forster, Howards End

I believe true friendships, true dialogue, can happen virtually. We didn't always believe this, kids. *rocks self in chair, tucks in lap blanket* I have gained KINGDOMS & QUEENDOMS from this aether.

Re: Only Connect

[ecosopher.livejournal.com]

I totally agree that true friendships can happen virtually. In fact, I think the term 'virtual friendship' is a misnomer--it might be happening in a virtual world, but it is very much a real friendship, and a real connection.

[lrig-rorrim.livejournal.com]

And for all that blathering I didn't answer the second part of your question, the "what do you expect from people commenting" bit. I'm going to blame the kitty on my lap. She's to blame for most things. ;)

I think my expectations vary based on what I post, and where. On the stories I post for Idol? I expect... um... anything, honestly. I'd be kind of amused and baffled if I got a knitting how-to manual as a comment, or a screed against pickles if I hadn't mentioned them in the story, but I post the stories publicly and to me that means people can say whatever they want. They can go in there and rant about me personally, or talk about how great they themselves are, or whatever. I kind of hope for reactions to the story, because that makes the most sense to me - reactions that are critical are more than fine, reactions that are emotional are fine, reactions that are entirely related to the technical aspects of the writing are fine. Anything's fine. Puns. Memories. Whatever. But expect? It's open on the internet. Could be anything.

And this is why it's hard for me to post personal stuff publicly, and why most of my personal journal is friends-locked and such. Anything I put out in the open online could garner any response. That's the cost of being public, to me. And sometimes I'm not up for that (ok, be fair. USUALLY I'm not up for that), and filtration happens. The only problems I've had are when my expectations for comments to the filtered stuff haven't been made clear. And that's pretty much all on me. *wry smile*

[bleodswean.livejournal.com]

and filtration happens

I read this as and FLIRTATION happens and it made me happy. But yes, filtering is something I've sadly learned is necessary, to, uh, protect the innocent. Besides, the entire world doesn't need to know that I hate washing dishes.

[ecosopher.livejournal.com]

I post to keep track of life for me, and also to keep in touch with others. I post to a specific few, and love that others read along, too.

Speaking of posting, I was going to take a bye, but something about boots came into my head yesterday and turned into a story. Would anyone be so kind as to beta it for me? I need to get some outside perspective.

[alycewilson.livejournal.com]

I will!

[porn-this-way.livejournal.com]

If my blog, Facebook, drinking party, etc., is ever a "safe space", then I've fucking failed. Given the current definition of "safe space" seems to mean "safe from opinions I disagree with", I'll take that as a shining example of exactly what *not* to do unless I'm actively on a mission to atrophy my brain. I do use a friends only filter on FB, but that's mainly because I'm a public school teacher in Texas and the only real options are either censor myself constantly (lol no) or lock it down. I choose Option B - say whatever the hell I'm gonna say, but gotta keep that shit where students and admins can't see it. With LJ, I’ll lock down non-LJI posts of a personal nature mainly because I view them as “backstage”, but I’ll also friend pretty much anyone who asks as long as I know they’re not from work.

As far as censoring opinions of commenters and friends on my social media posts - hell fucking no! Disagree with me, disagree with other commenters, start a damn flame war if you want! There have been a couple of times I've asked people to please scale back some really vicious personal attacks against one another for the same reason I'd tell a couple of people to cool it if they were about to get into a fist fight at a party I was hosting, but lord knows I've argued with people in my own comments sections a ton, and I never, under any circumstances, want any social media page of mine to be some grab-ass fluffy bunny group hug for the terminally butthurt.

Quite frankly, I get super pissed at people who post sociopolitical opinions out in the open and then go all "waaaah waaaah safe space!!1!1" when people want to discuss the damn issue. You don't get to light a match at the gas pump and then demand to be flame-proof! That ain't how the world works. Now if there's a forum or an LJ comm or something that's a designated "safe space" for whatever and clearly marked as such - okay, fine. But a fucking twitter hashtag is not a "safe space" and it's infuriating and brazen and cowardly all at once when people just waltz into shared or public territory, plant their “safe-space” flag, and act like that gives them the right to shut other people down. No, sweet pea, it doesn’t.

[anyonesghost.livejournal.com]

I feel like you're holding back. What are you trying to say here? :-)

[alycewilson.livejournal.com]

I write my LJI posts because I news to exercise my creative muscle. I write to make sense of the world and to try to convey to others what I have learned. I also write out of joy and to make people laugh.

My personal posts have declined since having my son nearly 4 years ago. But does anyone really have time for such things any more? Too much info always buzzing around our heads.

[bleodswean.livejournal.com]

These years will fly. FLY. Cherish them and know that there will be time...

[porn-this-way.livejournal.com]

Phew, anyways! Now that the Ranty McRantypants is out of my system (for at least the next five minutes)...

- What do I expect when I post? Who knows. Usually what I *want* is lulz for an Idol post, or advice or input for a “what should I do in this situation?” post, or flames if I’m blatantly trolling, but wanting a expecting aren’t the same thing at all.

- Why do I post? Exactly what lrig_rorrim said. Because I've got something to say. Or because I have an Idol deadline. You know, whichever.

- Is my blog a safe ANYTHING space? Hell bleepin' NO!

- Am I only posting to certain people? Not really. I'm obviously trying to get votes from Idol posts, so I'm writing for an audience with those, but that's about it. I'll lock down my FB and more personal posts on LJ for reasons mentioned in my previous comment, but I've also got an extremely liberal friending policy. My filters are about protecting my livelihood and presenting a polished face for LJI, not about sheltering myself from things I don't agree with. Other than that, I'll occasionally filter extended family members and family friends off FB posts that mention my sexuality, simply because I don't want any of my hilljack relatives giving my mom shit.

- As for the Not All Men thing - honestly, I've always specified "not all men" whenever I bitch about patterns of neanderthal behavior from certain types of dudes, because I'm generally against making sweeping blanket statements about large, diverse groups of people. I also happen to have tons of wonderful dudes in my life who would never in a million years treat me or any other woman the way some of these knuckle-dragging buttdouches do, and it ain't gonna kill me to type three extra words to make it clear I'm not bashing my friends. I certainly appreciate the same courtesy when someone's talking about a group of which I'm a member, ya know? Say what you mean and mean what you say or miscommunication is bound to happen - it's more important than ever in this online world of contextless share buttons. And I do think it's important to differentiate between "[nearly] all X have experienced Y from a Z" and "Z does Y to X." Nearly all women have experienced some form of sexism or misogyny from a male is an accurate statement. Men are sexist and misogynistic toward women is a different statement entirely and completely unfair.

[unmowngrass.livejournal.com]

That last paragraph -- *applauds*

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

Is anyone else following the Seth Rogen/AnnHornaday threads on Twitter?

It's interesting to see what people pick out of bigger picture arguments as well as what people throw into them to try to get more attention.

It does make me wonder where entertainment is going to be in 20 years.

Miss Idol?

[theun4givables.livejournal.com]

Did you bye-out? Get voted off? Get eaten by real life and you want back in?

Then I am just the person you are looking for. ;)

CLICK THIS LINK IF YOU WANT TO LIVE! (again) (http://theun4givables.livejournal.com/192209.html)

<3

Re: Miss Idol?

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

FYI - it's not limited to just people who participated. You have the door keys. You can let in any *non-banned* people you want. ;) )

[mothermelete.livejournal.com]

I don't post a lot, but I'm open to respectful debate. On my facebook, I've had to delete people who have views that I feel are harmful who cannot handle viewpoints that differ from their own, nor do they respond to actual facts either. Sometimes you just can't win against the stupid, so I have to do things to keep myself from getting agitated.

[ashgaelsonaria.livejournal.com]

Home Game
http://ashgaelsonaria.livejournal.com/285444.html

I do not post with expectations concerning response. I mostly post writings of mine and occasionally Updates on things that are going on or rants.
The life update are for friends that I do not get to see. Right now my only social life is online. I do not get out with the ecception of doing shopping at the begining of the month. The poetry and general writing is for everyone. The rants I post as a way of just getting the corprolite out of my system. Sometime I make them public sometimes I make them for my eyes only and no one else ever sees them.
This is were I go to interact with people and to rage against the things I can not do anything about.
Face it I am a world class loser who has not real life.
Heck my home game entry is a little bit of all of the above.

[reckless-blues.livejournal.com]

Honestly, I post because I'm bored and because I like to hear myself talk. I'm naturally a very private, stoic, unemotional person ... I have the classic surgeon's personality (and that is 100 percent of the reason why I'm single). I'm not completely devoid of human warmth like I joke about sometimes, but I have internal freedom, and that's where I live, on the inside. I'm just a wild animal. And I don't always feel the right things at the right times, so people think I'm freezing cold. Talking about myself personally is like pulling teeth for me. I need the practice. So. I try to make more personal posts on my Tumblr because my psychologist keeps insisting that I need to be more social and emotionally liable.

I expect from my comments unlimited adoration. Unlimited, I say.

[bleodswean.livejournal.com]

*adores*

I think that virtual reality is a custom-made fit for folks similar to what you're saying you are in the "outside" reality. It's perfect for this and is truly growth-provoking.

[zhent.livejournal.com]

Most of the time I post to work something out in my head and get feedback on my thought processes.

Sometimes I post just because I want to.

And sometimes I post just to get feedback on things or start a conversation, though LJ is kind of quiet on that front lately.

Generally though I post just because I want to.

On the "not all men" thing... I absolutely understood what was happening on twitter over the weekend and while I took some small part in that conversation (as a man) I knew up front that those using the #notallmen tag were being part of the problem. I chose instead to use other tags to express my frustration at being lumped in with people I have nothing to do with. Sweeping generalizations are just inherently wrong and anyone using them needs to get a grip. But in the topic of the women in our lives being safe and able to do the things they want to do, I will defend their need for safety, and I understand (as well as a man can) their fears. I will also say #toomanymen...

[labelleizzy.livejournal.com]

*applause*

that's for your last paragraph. and yes to your first three points, I do that too.

Just to make sure everyone knows this...

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

Idol is NOT your "safe place".

There is a mad man out to get you! Eventually, he will get everyone, except ONE PERSON, who will be spared.

[ryl.livejournal.com]

Now I have The Talking Heads' "Psycho Killer" playing in my head.

Run run run run run run run away

[veronica-rich.livejournal.com]

The insidious thing about "not all men" is it's often not just aimed at countering "men are awful!" type comments, but also hauled out for stories of "XXX happened to me, as a girl/woman because I'm a girl/woman in this society and this thing is wrongly accepted to just be the price of being female." The vast majority of non-troll "yes all women" tweets I read this weekend were of the latter variety. (I am not fond of the "all men are scum" variety of comment; I prefer to focus on the existence of the specific problems women face in the hopes they will be addressed without demonization.)

Like, when I'm telling you that I have to be hyper-aware walking to my car at night, that's not an invitation to hear "I wouldn't attack a woman!" Well, congratulations on not being a criminal douchebag. But that's not really the problem. If you were the only guy in the world, I'd be able to take a nap on the sidewalk at 3 am - but you're not, and these attacks happen a lot more to women from men than vice versa. (I don't mean you, Gary; the general "you" of course. Though I imagine you're likely not a criminal either. :-) )

Anyway. I think of the "safe space" designation meaning "don't come in here and hijack the thread away from its purpose to aggrandize yourself," not that you can't participate in a space I establish. But that's only IMHO.

[whipchick.livejournal.com]

Best analogy I've read so far:

If I was bitching about cleaning my bathroom and saying how horrible it was that my roommate always left the bathroom like this, 99% of people out there would say, oh yeah I hate when they do that. They would not say, well I've been a roommate and I never left the bathroom filthy! Not All Roommates Are Like That!

With the extension being, dude, I'm not accusing the person I'm currently talking to, I'm stating my feelings about a wretched situation.

[ryl.livejournal.com]

I take it from the comments that the "Not ALL Men" thing happened on Twitter? Reason #eleventybillion for me to stay away from that drama llama site.

As for why I post, well lately it's mainly for Idol. Occasionally I'll have something to say. I need to have more to say, really. I might be able to deal with certain things if I indulge in a little LJ As Therapy or just some thought meandering.

[veronica-rich.livejournal.com]

I guess it was FB too; I don't have a FB account so I don't know, but I heard tell.

Twitter isn't so bad if you use it in moderation, like any other platform. (I remember a fan war on LJ in my fandom many years ago, before Twitter even existed.) You can't live on it, though, or shouldn't.

[penpusher.livejournal.com]

There is a lot of grist in this mill!

So, my journal was, originally, back in the spring of 2001, going to be a promotional tool for a book. I even made a community related to that and got some really interesting responses.

After the September 11th attacks, everything had to change. It became a place to communicate, to share thoughts. That's when my LJ really became a journal.

I post and had posted for a variety of reasons. I was partially using it as a standard diary. I was documenting meeting other LJ users. I was sharing photos or sharing thoughts (something I called "thinkposts" where I would come up with a concept and riff on it. The latest of that sort is my entry in this week's Idol!)

I posted quizzes I created. I posted stories of my life. I posted writings I did for various stuff.

Idol is a good thing for me because it forces me to open my journal back up after having it friendslocked for years. I'm thinking of opening some of the archive as well, at least the thinkposts.

I ran away from FB in July 2012, and have not missed it even a little. Even though some of the wonderful people I first met on LJ went there and never came back, After the 2012 commentary about President Obama and the election, I knew that was not the place for me to be. And these comments were coming from people I knew IRL! It was horrendous.

I had to come back to LJ, a place where people are a bit more thoughtful. And I'm delighted to be here, as a part of this collective of writers! I know we don't always see eye to eye on topics, but I think the interaction here would always be more sensible, more cogent and more useful than what I used to see on FB.

LJ is my home on the internet. I bought my Perm Account in 2006 and it was possibly the best thing I've ever bought online.

[impoetry.livejournal.com]

I think I'm done posting anything in social media, including, likely Idol. I don't understand people's intentions when they post something, and if I put something out there as a response, I leave myself open to being mis-read, or attacked. I can't handle it.

I hide in my home, most of my days because of social anxiety, because I'm afraid of what people will think of me.

I'm finding it's no different on social media. I'm afraid of what people will think of me, and when I so share, or speak up, it goes poorly.

I can't handle it anymore.

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

I'm not trained in this at all, so what I'm saying is probably complete bullshit.

But from what I *have* seen, I don't see many people recommending "withdrawal from social interaction completely" as being healthy.

As someone who rather likes you, and who hopes that you WILL come out of that house to go to a show with me at some point (or maybe get some Thai!) I'd definitely argue against doing that.

I'm sure that it can be overwhelming, and scaling back from time to time to reflect doesn't hurt.

After blow-ups online, I find that I'm more gun-shy than usual and over-thinking interactions. In most cases though, I tend to find that I'm thinking about it more than the other person is... and that's *me*! ;)

As for posting in Idol goes - I'm going to have to read your entries one way or another. Do you want it to be on Idol, or showing up at your house to read what you've been writing? :P

[xshibumix.livejournal.com]

I'm a regular poster..as you may have noticed lol Most things that I post on my personal facebook page I post for myself as a reminder and for the off chance that whatever it is I posted can inspire someone the way I was inspired by it. I don't post as much of my personal life as I do inspirational quotes or memes that I find. I also try to only post about the good things in life unless I'm really needing advice on something or there's Survivor to talk about lol. I just think there's enough negativity being put out in the "real" world that in most cases it's refreshing not to have to see it all the time on Facebook... at least for me that's how it is and how I feel when I go on the FB :)

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

I know you definitely recognize one of those scenarios. ;)

(which is why I added the disclaimer. It was a completely different one that stuck in my head, where both parties pretty much went off the rails on each other. In comparison, the one where you were involved was pretty tame!)

My FB is usually pretty positive. Unless it's just something that I find funny. I tend to fall into the "no one really wants to hear me complaining" category.

[labelleizzy.livejournal.com]

this post made me look at my stats. Eleven years here, as of next month and over 5100 posts I've made in my "little" blog.

*boggle*

Wal, shee-yit, mebbe ah AM a writer!