Green Room - Week 2 - Day 6

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

I apologize for posting the Green Room this morning and then deleting it an hour later. There were just some critical flaws in it that were highly embarrassing. People could actually *see* the comments being left by other people!

Which is a horrible thing to have had happened. I know that no one is interested in seeing that kind of thing, much less admitting that there might be “other people” and I have arranged with LJ and Obamacare to help cover your mental health needs that may have been triggered by this incident.

If you said anything poignant or witty, I’m sorry – but you were mistaken. No one ever posts that sort of thing around here.

There is however, a link to the polls: http://therealljidol.livejournal.com/656952.html which is the kind of thing that gets posted all the time, and totally without incident!

Comments

[bookishgeek.livejournal.com]

Doing a DITL post today to keep me awake at work!

How are everyone's seasonal allergies?

[xo-kizzy-xo.livejournal.com]

You're FRIST!!!!

[xo-kizzy-xo.livejournal.com]

My seasonal allergies are @#$*^@#^%$ )!@#&*#, although right now they're not quite as bad since we had rain for most of the weekend. I suspect they're going to go the other way when our supposed "heat wave" hits later in the week :p

[xo-kizzy-xo.livejournal.com]

I sally forth to work this afternoon!

It's going to be interesting...I think.

[cacophonesque.livejournal.com]

Good luck with that. And be sure to let us know what kind of whackadoodle crazy has been happening in your absence. ;)

[n3m3sis43.livejournal.com]

I'm, like, the only person who didn't drink on Memorial Day. And yet, I feel nauseated and have all morning. I had a 9 am conference call I couldn't call out of because people would assume it was a holiday hangover, I'm sure.

I showed up, and out of 8 people who were supposed to be there, there was me and ONE person from the other vendor. I can't win today. ;-)

Hoping to work on my book today if I feel less ick later. And maybe make blog posts and read Idol entries.

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

I didn't drink on Memorial Day.

Then again, I don't drink.

[medleymisty.livejournal.com]

I wish to say poignant things!!!

I finally got up the ovaries to start reading the comments on my entry, after being encouraged by the beautiful comments friends gave me on Tumblr.

And I’m not crying, but only because I won’t allow myself to for some reason.

Guys.

Guys.

There are people who love me, who value me, who listen to me, who hear what I say now. You guys don’t hate me. You don’t criticize me for who I am. I say what I have to say, and you don’t abandon me. You don’t yell at me. You don’t lecture me about how I’m all wrong and bad for having emotions, for saying what I think and feel.

Wow.

That means so much. I mean it. I mean - if you read the entry, then you have some idea of my childhood, and then I’ve posted about the years of hate secrets here too, and the emotionally abusive ex-best friend who aggravated the hate secrets, who saw the pain and hurt and shame that they caused and added to it, who kept me unstable and unsure and isolated and ashamed.

I have good friends now. I have good healthy friends now, who respect my boundaries, and who are good to me and who are kind, and….

I am crying now. I am sobbing.

I love you guys. You have no idea what you do for me, with your kind messages, your willingness to keep being my friend through all my sillinees and sturm und drang and strong opinions and stupid things, through me being me.

I love you more than even my words can say, and you have to know that you are helping me to heal from a lifetime of trauma and abuse, that you are teaching me what it’s like to be healthy and human, that you are bringing me up out of the deep darkness and into the light.

Thank you.

Thank you.

[n3m3sis43.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

You deserve to heal and to feel you have the right to cry and hurt and be comforted. Just so you know. :)

[kathrynrose.livejournal.com]

Feeling generally yucky today. :(

[roina-arwen.livejournal.com]

Is feeling Generally yucky better or worse than feeling Majorly yucky? I can never get those straight, which one outranks the other!

[cacophonesque.livejournal.com]

+ I started reading entries. Because I want to finish reading this week

+ My coffee this morning is tasty and satisfying

- Posting poetry again feels like I'm standing naked in a room full of ravenous budgies, which is to say rather vulnerable

+ Went to the playground yesterday and played. Advantages of having a kid!

- Been sneezy.

+ It's another sunny day here, so I can go for a nice walk to the ocean

- Need to go grocery shopping

+ Grocery shopping means a 9 mile roundtrip bike ride

- Which could be seen as a negative depending on when we end up going

+ Hello Green Room

[medleymisty.livejournal.com]

I have your entry open in a tab (at home, am at work right now), and I promise I will be nice and gentle with your poetry!

Woo playground! I was all sneezy yesterday, and my nose just started running now. Sigh.

Yay ocean! Where do you live?

And bike rides in the sun sound like fun to me! But 9 miles is a bit much.

[mezzogiorno.livejournal.com]

I'm doing okay this morning. Enjoying slowly working my way through the entries, and soon I'll go home for lunch.

There are some truly great entries this week, and I went through a big patch where I honestly had to vote for everything I read D:

[medleymisty.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Yay for going home for lunch! I used to be able to do that, back in the misty days of old and yore and all that.

There are always great entries! I always end up voting for a fair few people. :)

[roina-arwen.livejournal.com]

Witty and poignant comment remains witty and poignant. ;)

At least it is a short work week, since we had yesterday off for Memorial Day.

Still waiting to get my car back from the repair shop, hopefully he got the flaw with the A/C fixed - it sort of sucks to have wonky A/C during late spring and early summer!

[lrig-rorrim.livejournal.com]

WisCon is over and miintikwa is on her way home and my kitties are all "YARG WHY WEREN'T YOU HERE?" and I'm tiiiiiiiired. I've got one more social thing planned today (lunch with an out of town friend before she heads home) and then I can officially hide in my cave and whimper. I find myself having a sort of remorse about the panels I didn't go to, which is silly. I went to LOTS of things and they were mostly fabulous (the one on writing fight scenes for women was particularly good, as was the power of play and hobbies are awesome and and and... yeah). Ah well.

Now, time to get reading!

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

I hope you kicked Kara for me. She deserves it!

[dreamsreflected.livejournal.com]

debating selling the baby on ebay as she was up every 40 minutes from midnight till I gave up and got up at 7:30, the middle kid was also up twice with nightmares...

So sleep didn't happen, and despite his constant "I'll totally take time off for the baby so you can sleep if you need it" wonderdaddy wandered off to work in some variation of a "mood" because the baby never stays up all night when it's convenient to him. Whatevs man, I'm over it. Sleep deprivation and I go way back to 2004, I'm hardcore.

Now to read and comment and um search for all the coffee.

[fourzoas.livejournal.com]

My deepest sympathies on your sleep deprivation and hoping for better sleep for the baby tonight!

[fourzoas.livejournal.com]

I have written my administrative self-evaluation, which is this awful sort of exercise in balanced self-flattery and self-flagellation. With any luck, I have successfully negotiated this Scylla/Charybdis situation; I find out this afternoon at my eval meeting with my supervisor.

While I wait, think I'll read some entries, starting with the Sudden Death folks, because they deserve much love and care this week.

[whipchick.livejournal.com]

Argh, good luck. So glad I'm not in a department any more. Love students, but "academe" can suck it.

[rummaj.livejournal.com]

I missed you. I'm glad you had all sorts of fun and things! Oooh - I'd be interested in hearing about all the things you learned like about fight scenes for women.

[lrig-rorrim.livejournal.com]

Aw, thank you! Maybe I'll write up the stuff I learned on writing techniques and process and worldbuilding (there are a LOT of worldbuilding panels at WisCon, which I love to attend) later on in this journal. Once I'm coherent. This may take a while...

[xo-kizzy-xo.livejournal.com]

We just returned from taking Ember on a lovely walk down by the river! I discovered a park the other day which I never knew was there, and it's part of a trail that's going to eventually lead from the city out to the nether reaches of my town. Bonus that it's positively gorgeous out today and she had a great time :)

1 hour and 15 minutes to work...

[medleymisty.livejournal.com]

You discover many interesting things on your walks with Ember. :)

[cacophonesque.livejournal.com]

Also on the positive column:

+ I have selected the pie I will make for my birthday this year: chocolate cream with cinnamon meringue.

[bewize.livejournal.com]

Nom.

Make it for my birthday, too!

[halfshellvenus.livejournal.com]

Gah, how is it a workday again?

I'm still trying to force that Justified story to finish (due tomorrow!!!!), and then start slogging through the Idol entries. The sheer quantity is always daunting at this stage.

I always imagine I'll leave fewer comments and save some time, but realistically speaking that doesn't seem to happen. Or help as much as I'd like to imagine. :O

[x-disturbed-x.livejournal.com]

I managed to comment on almost everything. I just went through them this weekend and by last night I wasn't sure I could read anymore, lol.

[jem0000000.livejournal.com]

Lol! :)

I am currently at a children's science museum with two adorable five-year-olds -- and their babysitter, which is the best way to go anywhere with small children. :)

[theun4givables.livejournal.com]

Dear GR: tell me to stop changing plot-like things as I rewrite/revise a novel. Please. It's killing me.

HOW MUCH TIME CAN I REALLY SPEND REWRITING THIS DAMN TRILOGY UNTIL I AM SATISFIED???

Answer: it better not be another 10+ years because I CANNOT HANDLE THAT.

*pulls out hair*

[anyonesghost.livejournal.com]

Stop that!

A novel is never "done." There is only "the moment when you stop revising it." If you keep changing plot threads, it will never end, and you will never get around to writing the sequel trilogy.

(Copy/pasted out of comments in my head that I address to myself.)

[x-disturbed-x.livejournal.com]

I was at work and then had to go to the doctor. The good thing is I am on meds for my anxiety now so that should help. :P

I missed a lot of GR action today.

[medleymisty.livejournal.com]

What sort of meds? Do they help? Well - I guess you say it should, so....;)

[sarcasmoqueen.livejournal.com]

I'm so late to this party... just wanted to say hello GR! hope everyone is having/had/will have a fantastic day!

[ashgaelsonaria.livejournal.com]

My head hurts too much for ether of those words right now.
I reached my wits end and fell of the edge two days ago. I might manage to scale my way back given time and rest but for now I am simply hanging on by a thread.
Additionally I am currently out of my mind. Please leave a message and I shall endever to respond when I return.

[deza.livejournal.com]

I really wish I had more time to play in the Green Rooms. Stupid work, getting in the way of important things!

[beldar.livejournal.com]

Ditto

[kathrynrose.livejournal.com]

::whew::

I've been reading most of the day, and I have about fifteen more entries to read, but I believe I would be doing those folks a huge disservice if I read them right now because I'm hot and my brain is tired and I already felt lousy.

BUT at least I know the poll closes WEDNESDAY night, which is tomorrow.

Also, I'm not prepared to make a rec list, but banyangirl#### (I forget) cracked me the hell up with her entry, and I really needed it.


Edit: also, has everyone seen the Cultural Appropriation conversation happening over at whipchick's house?

[sweeny-todd.livejournal.com]

ugh. I am trying to write something, the due date is next wednesday, and I need to get it done ASAP so my collaborator can look at it and it is just so hard!!

[nancytoday.livejournal.com]

Too funny!