Green Room - Week 11 - Day 04

[clauderainsrm.livejournal.com]

http://therealljidol.livejournal.com/680460.html is where the topics are located, as well as where entries are starting to come in. I'd highly recommend that you take some time to read them. It never hurts to read in advance. It gives you more time to comment, and commenting is always a good thing!

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It feels like I've been in "advice mode" quite a bit lately, both in "real life" and online. What is the best advice that you regret *not* taking! ;)

Comments

[porn-this-way.livejournal.com]

Advice I wish I'd taken: "Are you sure you're not gay? I think you might be into women. Why don't you try dating a few and see how you feel?" If I had taken this advice as a teenager, I probably would have saved myself a ton of confusion in high school, college, and early adulthood. But I lived in such a homophobic part of the country that I'd pretty much learned that gay people were an entirely different species, like some sort of mysterious phenomenon or something, and I couldn't possibly be one. (It never seemed reasonable to dislike them or anything, because that was stupid and pointless, but asking me if I was gay at the time was like asking me if I was a turtle - not insulting, just "Whaa...?" and totally impossible and nonsensical, because turtles were turtles, and I was me.)

Advice I'm glad I had the common sense to ignore the shit out of: "You need to try and fit in more, or you're going to end up in nerd corner." Well, I *did* end up in need corner, but I own that shit, so suck it.

[michikatinski.livejournal.com]

I also lived in a homophobic place, and I also learned that gay people were a different species. I turned out to be straight, but it was quite a surprise when person after person that I really liked turned out not to be straight. It was beyond my comprehension for years. Ridiculous. :P

[porn-this-way.livejournal.com]

Lol! That was kinda how it was for me too! Obs I didn't turn out to be straight, but when I got to college, I lived in the dorm that attracted musicians, artists, and theater majors, so half the dorm was some flavor of queer. At that point, it was just like "wait. These people are just like everyone else - they go to class, gripe about their professors, make friends, have the exact same silly relationship drama as the heterosexual world but with people of the same sex...this whole "other species" thing doesn't make a whole lot of sense." It took a while for me to truly internalize the idea that being gay was more on par with being left handed or something than being an entirely different species, but that was definitely the "heeeey wait a second, these gay people are normal people" turning point.

[oxymoron67.livejournal.com]

I was never confused. I knew I was gay, and therefore, a different, lesser species.

It sucked.

[porn-this-way.livejournal.com]

Boooo. We are a sparklier, snarkier species, dammit!

Homophobia-saturated culture sucks super hard, and not in the fun way. I'm sorry you had to deal with that particular brand of fuckery.

[x-disturbed-x.livejournal.com]

I never went through that and maybe it's because I didn't grow up in such a homophobic environment. I just realized I liked girls when I was a teenager and was like yep, okay. There was never any confusion.

[meepalicious.livejournal.com]

I had a similar experience. I had been bullied for being a "lesbian" since before I even knew what the word meant (my legal name can be twisted into sounding vaguely like "lesbian"), so when people (innocently (and correctly)) suggested I might be into women, my knee-jerk reaction was to say "no."

Whoops. I guess they were right.