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clauderainsrm.livejournal.com) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
therealljidol2009-02-26 11:58 pm
clauderainsrm.livejournal.com) wrote in therealljidol2009-02-26 11:58 pm
Entry tags:
Afternoon idolies,
Checks pot to see if any coffee is left.
Hmmm, empty.
Cleans it out to make fresh.
Waits for coffee to brew.
The sun is out in force today. Feels like spring over here in CA. Feels pretty darn good.
Went and got business done and even took my retired guide out for a nice walk in our complex.
What are folks up to other then watching the polls?
Checks pot to see if any coffee is left.
Hmmm, empty.
Cleans it out to make fresh.
Waits for coffee to brew.
The sun is out in force today. Feels like spring over here in CA. Feels pretty darn good.
Went and got business done and even took my retired guide out for a nice walk in our complex.
What are folks up to other then watching the polls?
Cool, first on page two. LOL! Yeah, that counts in my books. LOL!
In case anyone is wondering where a certain comment went, it has been screened at the personal request of the person it was about.
I left the rest of it because I think what was expressed in reaction is worth keeping.
I left the rest of it because I think what was expressed in reaction is worth keeping.
Dude, I get that we're all adults here, and that you try to keep your hands off this process as much as possible and that the drama helps to make this just like a real reality show! And, of course, I get why you screened that comment.
However, since the comment is screened, people who missed it don't know how serious this mess has become. And I think you need to say something, and I think it needs to be said up front and center, not buried at the end of a green room where people probably won't notice it.
I'm just a bit ticked off with the usual bullshit, and ultimately, that's not very important. But this _is_ a writing contest and it _is_ about community. What it's not is about people gleefully eating each other alive and people actually experiencing harm.
Words have real consequences. The content of our entries bear that out as surely as the ramifications of our social interactions.
And while I don't necessarily think it will do a damn bit of good, you need to say something.
However, since the comment is screened, people who missed it don't know how serious this mess has become. And I think you need to say something, and I think it needs to be said up front and center, not buried at the end of a green room where people probably won't notice it.
I'm just a bit ticked off with the usual bullshit, and ultimately, that's not very important. But this _is_ a writing contest and it _is_ about community. What it's not is about people gleefully eating each other alive and people actually experiencing harm.
Words have real consequences. The content of our entries bear that out as surely as the ramifications of our social interactions.
And while I don't necessarily think it will do a damn bit of good, you need to say something.
I screened it because after talking to the only person who actually knows the situation, because she is living it, I was asked to do so.
Which means I also know how much the "cause" cited is an accurate depiction of how the person feels, and how much is just from someone who cares about her making leaps into areas where she might disagree.
Apparently this is something that is going to be discussed between the two of them, and I respect that. That is where it probably should have stayed given all the circumstances in play. Which is why I screened the comment but kept up yours.
I thought the reminder that every single user name here is attached to a real life person is something that everyone should keep in mind. Not just here but wherever they might go.
Which means I also know how much the "cause" cited is an accurate depiction of how the person feels, and how much is just from someone who cares about her making leaps into areas where she might disagree.
Apparently this is something that is going to be discussed between the two of them, and I respect that. That is where it probably should have stayed given all the circumstances in play. Which is why I screened the comment but kept up yours.
I thought the reminder that every single user name here is attached to a real life person is something that everyone should keep in mind. Not just here but wherever they might go.
But over time it seems the nature of the contest has changed. Pressure to continue playing, keep up with the social aspects, avoid the "drama" etc becomes incredibly stressful and overwhelming. For a person who is so used to playing things up front and being direct, the sheer amount of subtlety, backhanded commentary, hidden agendas and voting analysis and gossip is near impossible. This is not the way she runs her relationships, and being forced into a situation where that's the norm to keep playing the game is devastating.
This is a succinct summary of what is malicious and unpleasant about playing LJ Idol.
I hope that Kassi does whatever she needs to do to take care of herself. I think her friends will support her decision, whatever it is, and anyone who gives her grief can go fuck themselves.
I can't believe that![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
clauderainsrm isn't aware of many of the unpleasant behaviors of contestants in this season and previous ones. What I don't understand is why those people aren't booted for that sort of nonsense. I can't decide which is the worse alternative - that it is silently condoned or that it just doesn't matter.
This is a succinct summary of what is malicious and unpleasant about playing LJ Idol.
I hope that Kassi does whatever she needs to do to take care of herself. I think her friends will support her decision, whatever it is, and anyone who gives her grief can go fuck themselves.
I can't believe that
clauderainsrm isn't aware of many of the unpleasant behaviors of contestants in this season and previous ones. What I don't understand is why those people aren't booted for that sort of nonsense. I can't decide which is the worse alternative - that it is silently condoned or that it just doesn't matter.Why are people not booted for not liking each other?
Or for making asses out of themselves at times?
Because like most things, those are completely subjective about where exactly that line is going to be drawn. Which is why it's handled case by case and on a complaint basis. I'm certainly not going to step into a situation between two (or more) adults and make a call where I am not neither wanted nor required.
Or for making asses out of themselves at times?
Because like most things, those are completely subjective about where exactly that line is going to be drawn. Which is why it's handled case by case and on a complaint basis. I'm certainly not going to step into a situation between two (or more) adults and make a call where I am not neither wanted nor required.
You are over-simplifying things - I'm not talking about booting people because they don't like each other or mediating playground fights. I'm talking about systematic cruelty and bad behavior. I'm talking about people who go out of their way to cause problems and create problems.
Re: Finally able to actually get to LJ
spydielives.livejournal.com
- 2009-02-28 03:01 (UTC) - ExpandBy now others may or may not have read my husband's post earlier today. I was made aware of it through a phone call from someone involved in idol. It is my understanding that it will be screened soon (if not already). And hopefully that will happen. I do not feel comfortable nor did I anticipate my personal life to come out in a public forum. But since it has, I find myself needing to correct the inaccuracies.
The truth is yes, along with other lj idol participants who are still in the game, I have depression and I have written about it publicly in idol posts this season. The face of depression is multifaceted. And, like other idol participants who have this, if I'm in a writing competition or going on a vacation for two weeks, if I'm going to have a depressive episode it'll come on its own, the symptoms themselves are what is agravated by outside forces, but the depression lives in me no matter if I'm in idol or not. My husband went into further detail, revealing some of my symptoms and ascribed that to idol. I don't want to re-cap those here, but I do want to say that lj idol plays as much of a part in my depression as looking at a calendar or going out to the store. And for those with concern, the appropriate people have been contacted and are aware of what is going on and are taking the needed steps.
This is the truth of the matter:
My mental disposition right now is not a direct link to idol. I want to continue to write. My husband misrepresented where struggles come into play. My struggles are internal for me; not external. I'm not trying to dismiss the effect of others on me, though. Socially, yes, I think everyone in the game at this point can say that at one point or another there have been some nastiness. And I think a lot of people can say that they felt stress from that nastiness.
I want to write. I feel that I'm in full stride at this point and I want to continue if that's what the polls end up reflecting that I should.
I hope I've addressed everything. I do think that the comments back to my husband's post were true though. Health comes first above all else, yes. And if things get that bad, there is a path out. And, what rm said about human interaction should not be taken with a grain of salt - it's very true and applicable no matter if this is the season with the least amount of drama or not - common human decency seems to be lacking sometimes.
Anyway, if anyone has any specific questions or concerns, my email can be found in my profile or email my user name @ livejournal.com.
I hope that I've covered everything I need to to set the record straight.
The truth is yes, along with other lj idol participants who are still in the game, I have depression and I have written about it publicly in idol posts this season. The face of depression is multifaceted. And, like other idol participants who have this, if I'm in a writing competition or going on a vacation for two weeks, if I'm going to have a depressive episode it'll come on its own, the symptoms themselves are what is agravated by outside forces, but the depression lives in me no matter if I'm in idol or not. My husband went into further detail, revealing some of my symptoms and ascribed that to idol. I don't want to re-cap those here, but I do want to say that lj idol plays as much of a part in my depression as looking at a calendar or going out to the store. And for those with concern, the appropriate people have been contacted and are aware of what is going on and are taking the needed steps.
This is the truth of the matter:
My mental disposition right now is not a direct link to idol. I want to continue to write. My husband misrepresented where struggles come into play. My struggles are internal for me; not external. I'm not trying to dismiss the effect of others on me, though. Socially, yes, I think everyone in the game at this point can say that at one point or another there have been some nastiness. And I think a lot of people can say that they felt stress from that nastiness.
I want to write. I feel that I'm in full stride at this point and I want to continue if that's what the polls end up reflecting that I should.
I hope I've addressed everything. I do think that the comments back to my husband's post were true though. Health comes first above all else, yes. And if things get that bad, there is a path out. And, what rm said about human interaction should not be taken with a grain of salt - it's very true and applicable no matter if this is the season with the least amount of drama or not - common human decency seems to be lacking sometimes.
Anyway, if anyone has any specific questions or concerns, my email can be found in my profile or email my user name @ livejournal.com.
I hope that I've covered everything I need to to set the record straight.
Oh! I really do hope that your husband had good intentions with that post of his.
You're right, though: people who live with depression have it. It's not something that comes into existence because of this contest.
I'm sending big hugs your way, chicky. Why, of course there's a gratuitous ass grab in there!
You're right, though: people who live with depression have it. It's not something that comes into existence because of this contest.
I'm sending big hugs your way, chicky. Why, of course there's a gratuitous ass grab in there!
We have discussed it and yes, he did have very good intentions. He was concerned about my wellbeing. I'm fine talking about it through email if you like, but I don't really feel the need to elaborate here. Thanks so much for the hugs though. : ) As for the ass grab? Wow. hehe
Blessings and good health to you!
thank you for explaining I was very confused which was leading me to be worried. Glad you are taking care of yourself.
Great topic change there.. :)
I am glad you are not quitting. I was worried.
who was quitting?? Gary???
No one's quitting.
At least not yet.
The night is still young.
At least not yet.
The night is still young.
I just want to re-iterate for the record one more time that no where in the green room did I say that I was quitting Idol. In fact, if I recall his (my husband's) statement correctly, not even my husband said that.
Well, it was a busy, emotional day, and I missed the Green Room until now, and wow.
Taps is playing on the Air Force Base. It's echoing through my neighborhood.
Safely rest.
I'm going to read some entries and go to bed.
Taps is playing on the Air Force Base. It's echoing through my neighborhood.
Safely rest.
I'm going to read some entries and go to bed.
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